We know that alot of guys don’t sign up with international dating agencies because they’re worried about being scammed. You don’t want to turn your credit card number over to some fly by night outfit and you certainly don’t want the emails you are receiving from Natasha to in fact be from Boris.
At ILS we researched each site we feature girls from to ensure, to the best of our ability, that the sites are fair to your wallet and your heart. We don’t feature sites that we believe are scams.
We give the straight scoop on scammers, players, and shady operators, and explain our approach to helping you find the love of your life. Scams are wildly misunderstood. Yes, you could get scammed, but if you use a little common sense the chances are pretty small.
Here are some tips to avoid online dating scams:
- First, never send money to a girl. NEVER! However, I know that some of you dumb lugs will break this rule, so at least don’t send money for six or eight weeks.
- Second, look for form letters. Make sure she is answering most if not all of your questions with specifics.
- Third, no matter what, meet the girl in person BEFORE you propose. Sure, you don’t think you’d do something that stupid, but a lot of guys do.
- Fourth, use a decent agency and read all of the information about the agency very carefully. The level of service varies widely among agencies and one of the main reasons some men believe they have been scammed is that they did not fully understand what the agency was offering. Some agencies are very bad about hiding the real costs and it is easily the most common grey area. It’s not quite a scam, because the information is all there, but these sites have purposely formatted it in such a way to make it hard for you to understand how much it will eventually cost you. So, be careful and budget your spending.
- Finally, realize that there is a difference between getting scammed and getting your heart broken or being jilted or being disappoint. Even under the best of circumstances most relationships don’t develop into passionate lifelong love affairs, but that is not the same thing as being scammed and many men who don’t find the great love of their life through an international dating site often decide they’ve been scammed.
As long as the lady and the agency and man were all acting in good faith no one scammed anyone, but the sad part of the human condition is that you can’t simply purchase happiness and it is impossible to control exactly how people will mesh with one another.
So, do your homework, make a plan, and take a shot at happiness. It will be an adventure and you’ll probably have some fun. If it works out that’s great. If not consider making changes to your plan and keep trying. Eventually you’ll find the person you are looking for.
Traps of International Dating
One trap that many men fall into when looking for love abroad is not verifying that the photo they see online matches the women that they are emailing with now. Some women may include a photo of what they looked like when they were younger. Or maybe even a photo of someone else.
Here is a neat way to make sure that the girl you are pursuing looks as good as her photo. What you want to do is send her a little gift like a small necklace or some flowers. Ask her to have a photo taken with her holding them up so that you can see how happy she is. Its a nice gesture that she will love. And you can make sure that she is genuinely that beautiful.
Unfortunately one of the biggest traps that some western men fall into is being taken advantage for their money. While the majority of foreign women are genuine and are looking for love there is a small calculating minority that just want to wring out cash from western men.
One thing that you want to look out for is if the women asks for money from you prematurely. You want to have established a relationship before you start providing any money at all. Even at this point the money should be for genuine reasons such as the cost related to getting a visa.
Signs to Watch out For
If you are looking for your foreign lady online there a couple of indicators that tip off she might not be genuinely looking for love. The first thing is make sure that you never give out any banking details. This may seem obvious but if the lady you are talking to is a scam artist she can be quite persuasive and will come up with what seems like a perfectly logical reason for needing the information. If you do get approached for your bank details you should end the relationship straight away and move onto someone who is genuine.
Pay attention to both the profile picture and the user name. Of course a foreign woman will want to entrance you with her beauty but you should be wary of women that are dressed in what would be considered a sleazy manner. Also if their user name has a direct sexual connotations you want to beware. These are often not genuine ladies looking for love.
Never send any money until you have actually visited the women in her own country and you are completely satisfied that she is one hundred percent genuine. Even when visiting her in own country do not provide her with money to go shopping with. It can be tempting to win her heart by giving her money but do not fall into this trap.
Of course you should pay for any dates that you go on as this is the natural role of a male in these countries. Once she has moved to your country then you can start to spoil her a little.
Common Concerns
Another common concern for western men is that they are only desired for their green card. Of course there will be some women who are looking for any exit out of the country that they are living in but these are the exception.
Foreign women are no different to western women in that they often love their home and their family. If anything these women are more attached to the place they grew up to and their family members. It is actually a hard choice for them to make to leave their home but like most people they are willing to make sacrifices for love.
The actual green card process protects you to a certain extent anyway. It is not possible for a women to simply marry you and have full residency rights. If you marry abroad it will take between six to nine months for the process to be completed. This will provide you with plenty of time to decide whether the marriage is right for you. If you are not yet married your fiancé can enter the country on the K-1 Fiancée visa. This will allow her to enter the country without having to be concerned about being stopped at customs. The visa is valid for ninety days before the marriage needs to take place.
Use this time to get to know the women that you intend to marry. Remember that if you feel that the connection is not there or something is not quite right about the relationship don't be afraid to end the process. The K-1 Fiancée visa requirements are there to protect you and so make sure that you are not being taken advantage of. While someone maybe able to hide their true self for a few days it will be very difficult to maintain a façade for three months.
There are plenty more fish in the sea so don't be swayed by your fiancées beauty. If the relationship does not feel right then simply try again.
ILS Article
