It is easier than ever to meet an incredible woman from anywhere in the world. You have opportunities that even the greatest kings and emperors did not have 1,000 years ago.
Even a hundred years ago traveling around the world was prohibitively expensive for all but the wealthiest men. Travel was still time consuming and often uncomfortable until the arrival of the jet age about sixty years ago.
The development of the internet about twenty-five years ago vastly reduced the costs and inconvenience of communicating with women around the world.
You no longer had to wait weeks or months for letters, but the development of instant chat less than a decade ago really changed things.
The Wonders of Chat
Instant chat means you can type a message in English and she will be able to read a translation in Russian, Spanish, Thai, or whatever her native language is.
Instant chat has some weaknesses (I will get into them later) but it is an amazing way to meet a girl for the first time.
It is also a lot of fun, because in video mode you can see a girl laugh at your jokes and smile. That instant feedback is what really makes instant chat great. It really is as close as you can get to meeting someone without being in the same room as the person.
If you are a guy in your late forties, talking to a beautiful younger woman, it can be pretty unnerving if you turn your cam on, but on most sites, it is completely up to you whether or not you turn your cam on.
So, don’t sweat it too much. Most of the time the women will be very generous about your looks, such as they are.
AnastasiaDate pretty much-invented chat, but today all the major international dating agencies except A Foreign Affair offer it. You can still send emails on all the sites and that can be useful, but most likely your first introduction to a lady will come about on instant chat.
So, the tips and clues offered here are designed with instant chat in mind, but most of them can be used in emails and letters too.
Setting Up Your Profile For Maximum Effect
Regardless of what dating agency or app you use your profile is important. A lot of guys skip over the profile, because they are in a hurry to get on with meeting the girls. That is a huge mistake.
Your profile is an advertisement for yourself. You want to highlight what makes you special. Talk about your life. Explain what hobbies you enjoy and be specific.
The more interesting detail you can provide the more you will stand out from the crowd.
It is hard to say how long it needs to be, but most of the agencies offer three categories that are something like:
- Describe Yourself
- Describe Your Interests
- Describe The Type of Woman You Are Interested In
This should be about your core values, who you are as a person. So, first, talk about yourself in the big picture. Are you religious? Are you laid back? Are you very detail oriented?
Think about how your co-workers and friends would describe your basic personality.
This is also the place to mention what you do for a living. Yes, you are more than your job, but think about how many times someone mentions a friend or relative and says, “He is a cop,” or “He is a lawyer.”
Your profession tells people a lot about you in a heartbeat. If you are not the normal cop or lawyer mention that here. For instance, if you are a cop who works children’s cases or something.
Do not lie or lie by omission by failing to mention something critical. If there are exceptional issues in your life, for instance if you are disabled or have unusual family obligations mention them.
Do not explain them in full. This is not the place for that but mention them here so a woman is not surprised by something really out of the ordinary.
About Your Interests
This is pretty straight forward. Discuss your hobbies. Do you work out or run? Do you like to read? Do you like movies? And again, it is great to be a little more specific.
For instance, if you just went out to Yellowstone or took a trip to Paris tell the lady.
But keep it open ended and don’t be negative. Don’t say, “I like almost all movies but romantic comedies,” that would be very bad, or mention you can’t stand soccer, because for the right lady you might just end up watching a lot of romantic comedies and discover your previously unknown interest in Manchester United.
The Type of Woman You Are Interested In
This is a little tricky, but describe her in the same sort of broad terms you used to describe yourself generously, kind, and so on.
At the same time if you like petite women it is fine to say it. Children are a hot button issue if you have kids at home or want kids. Go ahead and explain those issues here, but try to be polite and generous.
The entire tone needs to be positive. That is extremely important. You can establish some parameters, particularly in the sections about you and the women you are interested in, but do not be negative.
As far as length goes it varies widely. A decent rule is that three sentences or less would be too short and more than seven sentences would start getting a bit long.
Also, these things get translated by machines so be careful about using big words and complicated language. This is particularly important for women who do not speak Spanish, Chinese, Arabic, or Russian.
Those are world languages and digital translation works fairly well for them. It does not work as well in languages with a smaller user base like Thai, Bulgarian, and the like.
Beyond that think of your profile as a sales document. Try to sell yourself to the women and they will read your profile. Keep that in mind.
Tips For Using The Dating Sites
Read The Women’s Profiles
Yes, these women have some amazing photographs but READ their profiles and any other information they have. The photo will draw you in. You are a guy. That is cool, but stop and read the profile of any woman you are chatting with as soon as possible.
It will give you something to discuss with her and help you decide if she is the type of woman you really want to spend your time and money getting to know.
Don’t Chat With Women You Are Not Interested In
This seems obvious, but if you have a hard and fast rule, for instance you are not interested in women with children or outside of a specific age range, do NOT chat with them. This is both better for the lady and better for you.
Yes, it is easy to find yourself interested in chatting with a hot mom or twenty-year-old, but resist the temptation. Because you will be shocked at how easy it is to make an emotional attachment to a woman who you are really not interested in. So, read her profile before you start chatting.
This will save you time and money.
Don’t Hesitate to Brag
Remember, you have got to impress the woman, so you need to really let her know why you are special. That mean you need to be willing to brag a little.
This is often difficult for men who grew up idolizing John Wayne, Clint Eastwood, and other strong silent movie heroes, but, remember, in the end everyone got to SEE how brave and honorable they were.
It would have been boring filmmaking for them to tell everyone they were brave and honorable.
In chat the only thing a woman has to judge you on is what you tell her, so you have to be more open about your accomplishments than you are in your normal life. Bragging is not a bad thing – not in and of itself. It just means letting the lady know what you have done that you are proud to have accomplished.
In your heart of heart you know what you are proud about. You know those times when you stepped up to the plate and did something hard, difficult, or particularly beautiful.
One easy rule of thumb is you should brag about the things you have accomplished if you would brag about your friends or loved ones doing the same things.
When you communicate with foreign ladies let them know about those critical moments in your life. They will never know your story if you don’t tell them.
Don’t Be a Blowhard
Yes, it is great to brag a little, but you can go too far. First, the women may not believe it if you cross that invisible line.
Worse, they may believe it. This can be bad, because you may blow yourself up so far that you can never live up to your own press and nothing is worse for building a positive long term relationship.
A good approach is to balance out bragging with some self-deprecating remarks. You know you have bad habits. Start by admitting some of your minor failings.
Generally, a woman is going to commiserate with you. She is going to tell you she understands and sometimes she eats too many sweets or hits the snooze button one time too many or whatever. Women understand that no man is perfect.
More importantly, sharing some of your failing with her shows you trust her and that means the world to these ladies.
Remember, they are just as worried about being scammed as you, maybe even more so, but at the same time most of them want to believe you are exactly who you say you are.
Use Video Chat
Chat is great, but video chat is especially useful, because you can see a woman’s real time reaction to whatever you are writing. It gives you something to chat about and lets you judge your responses.
It is also a great way to sort out the scammers, because often scammers do not use the video function. Almost every new laptop sold in the last twenty years has a cam, so almost any woman with access to a computer has access to a cam.
Yes, it is possible that a woman does not have a cam. It is possible, but rare. A bigger issue is low bandwidth that makes it tough for the cams to work. I don’t have a solution for that issue.
But what will really surprise you is how many super-model hot girls you will get to see in chat. I was shocked and you will be shocked too. You just do not expect a girl to look as incredible in a little chat window as she does in professionally shot photographs.
Guess what? Sometimes she looks even better!
Look at the next page. Those women are just a small sample of some of the beauties I’ve chatted with in the past six months, and I am a fat, boring 56-year-old. You can probably do as well or better.
These women were all sweet and interesting. I had a blast chatting with them.
If you don’t believe me go check out BeHappy2Day. It will make a believer out of you in a hurry.
Do Not Fall In Love On The First Date
One huge mistake you do not want to make is to fall in love on the very first chat or even the second or third. If you tell a woman you love her.
Just because the hot young woman from Thailand or Ukraine wants to believe all of your stories does not mean you should believe all of hers. I am being honest.
You will chat with many girls who will tell you right away that they want to marry you and so on. Some of them are being honest.
Often girls sign up for international dating sites after being treated awfully by a guy from their home country and nearly all of these women have an aunt, cousin, or friend who has married a Western guy and is living happily in Cleveland, Sydney, or even rural Scotland.
So, they are ready to get going if they meet the right guy.
And if they think YOU are the right guy they will come on strong. Just say, “You are awesome, but we need to be friends until we meet face to face.” She will probably offer more compliments, but just tell her, “I consider you a friend, but let’s just see where things go. Like in real life.”
And if you ever break down and tell her you love her she is going to believe you, so be VERY careful with love and other four letter words.
One seduction tactic that leads to a lot of disastrous relationship is lying. Do not lie. Of course, you do not have to tell a woman you are interested in EVERYTHING, but be sure that everything you say has a good basis in truth.
This is an area that lawyers and salesmen have a real advantage. It is all about telling the best version of the truth without lying.
But if a woman asks you a direct question go ahead and tell her the blunt truth. If you were not a great husband to your first wife or you are battling a drinking problem or your weight and she asks about it, tell her.
Usually, even through a translator your honesty and pain will come through. If she has a big heart it will tug on her heart strings. Women are nurturers. They want to help the little boy in you. And usually, this stage of an online relationship only occurs after several chats.
And always remember, that if she is asking hard questions she is only asking because she wants to really get to know you better. So, take a deep breath and repeat after me, “Hard questions are a good thing.”
It’s the truth.
Ask Her Questions
Be sure and go through all of the standard questions you would ask on a first date. Where did she grow up? How many siblings does she have and so on. These questions are a bit dull and you shouldn’t ask them all at once.
Keep a few of these in mind for the times when the conversation slows down, and it will. At those moments they will be a lifeline.
Try to Be Funny
It is tough to be funny. That’s why a really great comic can earn a fortune. It is hard, but try to offer a little word play. Often self-deprecating humor is the easiest to pull off.
And use emoticons. Look your joke may fall flat. She may not get it, but if you slap a smiley face or something at the end of the comment it will be clear to her that you were trying to be funny. She will appreciate the effort.
But your humor needs to start out very subtle and old fashion. In your first chat you should not tell her any jokes you would not tell your mom. Start out with humor in the tradition of Bob Hope or someone along those lines. Later you can ease towards racier material, but start out conservative.
Don’t be offensive. That is a paramount rule. You are not Andrew Dice, thank God, and don’t try to be.
Don’t Be Afraid to Compliment Her
One of the main problems guys have in all types of relationships is that they are hesitant to give women too many compliments. This is the flip side of being hesitant to brag on yourself, but this is even more important.
Yes, it is odd to walk up to a woman in a bar or on the street and give her a compliment in the very first time you meet her, but in chat you need to tell her EXACTLY why you are attracted to her.
Don’t be shy. She wants to know you are into her. Tell her which photos are great. Look for little details other guys have never noticed.
If she has incredible tits. It is certainly fine to tell her that in a polite manner, probably without using “tits” in the sentence, at least the first time. But later you need to give her deeper compliments about.
This is why it is so important that you read her profile. In the first few minutes drop in a compliment based on something in her profile. That shows her you are serious; you took the time to read her profile. It also shows her you are smart, because you saw something special in her.
This helps set you apart from the run of the mill guy and shows her that you are focusing on HER. Women love authentic compliments! You can take that to the bank or the bedroom.
Do Not Be Romeo
Do not be Romeo. Romance is one of the greatest topics of art, literature, and film. It is a topic that everyone understands, because on some level everyone’s life is both a romantic tragedy and a romantic comedy. You can learn from those stories.
Don’t be a Romeo. If Romeo had decided to dedicate his life in honor of Juliet eventually he would have saved them both, but instead he decided to destroy himself for his love. So, don’t be Romeo. Don’t destroy yourself for your love.
Be Jerry Maguire. Jerry didn’t die for his love. He LIVED for her. That’s a beautiful story. He became a better man, because of the love of a good woman.
When things are not going the way you want them to channel your inner Jerry Maguire and even if you can’t win the love of a particular woman always treat her with grace, patience, and class.
You will be shocked at how easy it is to form an emotional attachment through chat. Enjoy it, but try to remember that to have a real relationship you have to actually meet the woman. I cannot stress this enough.
That is why I discourage you from ever, ever saying “I love you,” until you actually meet the woman you are interested in. Chatting is great for shifting through all of the amazing women out there and deciding who you actually want to meet in person, but it is no substitute for a meeting.
Which Dating Sites Should I use?
Below is a list of our favorite sites from around the world. Basic registration is free for all of the sites, so you can register and scout out as many sites as you want for free.
EVERYONE should register at A Foreign Affair. They offer every service from basic email introductions to Executive Tours and visa services. They are totally legit. You should sign up and spend some time on their site because it is loaded with great free information.
Whatever sites you decide to sign up with, look at the ladies, read their profiles, and decide if you really are interested in the HOTTEST women in the world. It is all up to you.
Our VIP Club will send you emails to help you overcome some of the biggest challenges in the coming weeks, but you have to man up and decide if you really are the kind of guy who can date one of the hottest women in the world.
Amolatina – The best chat site for Latin ladies. There are hundreds of Latin ladies to chat with 24/7.
A Foreign Affair – This is the most complete Latin dating agency and they offer numerous tours each year. There is no better way to meet an amazing Latin lady than with the world-class help of A Foreign Affair.
AsianDate.com – An amazing Asian chat site. AsainDate has thousands of incredibly hot Vietnamese, Thai, and Chinese ladies for you to talk with any time of the day or night.
A Foreign Affair – With A Foreign Affair you can travel to meet the Asian lady of your dreams. They offer more tours to more locations than any other international dating web site.
BeHappy2day – BeHappy is a fun, fast chat agency that has the hottest Eastern European ladies you have ever dreamed of. With BeHappy you can be online and chatting in less than five minutes.
A Foreign Affair – AFA has been leading tours to Eastern Europe for over twenty years. They have helped launch literally tens of thousands of relationships. There is no better company to meet your lady love with than A Foreign Affair.
Afro Introductions – The largest African dating site. There are thousands of gorgeous women from across Africa.
Ethiopian Personals – Ethiopian women are HOT! Damn HOT and there is no better place to meet them than Ethiopian Personals.
Middle Eastern Sites:
Muslima – A great site for men interested in devoted Muslim women
Arab Lounge – The largest dating sites for singles from across the Middle East.
IndianCupid – Probably the best site for expat Indians or members of the broader Indian diaspora to meet members of the opposite sex.
DesiKiss – A huge Indian dating site with thousands of beautiful Indian girls.
How to Make International Dating Agencies Work for YOU!
International dating agencies are in an extremely competitive industry. They really want your business and they really want you to be a satisfied customer. They will move mountains to make you happy if you just know what to ask for and how to ask.
So, here are a few pointers to get the dating services to treat you like royalty:
Read Our Reviews!
At ILS we work very hard to explain the agencies’ services and price structure to help you get the best price and service you can, so take advantage of our research.
Sign Up For Free!
Every agency offers some sort of a free sign up. It is really worth it to sign up at two or three agencies just to get a feel for how they operate. All of them want to send you email newsletters and updates, usually profiles of their latest girls, but sometimes they offer specials exclusively to their newsletter members.
Read The Fine Print!
Yes, the girls are hot and you are interested, but before you open your wallet be sure about what you are buying. Are you buying postal addresses, email addresses, letters, tokens of some sort, or even phone numbers?
Sometimes you might be buying into a new membership level, if so, what does that mean?
The biggest thing to watch out for are recurring charges and lack of an email address because in most of the world the postal service is somewhere between poor and non-existent.
Today nearly everyone can be reached in a couple of days through email, so don’t spend money on a girl who doesn’t have email or access to email through an agencies’ email system.
If You Are Not Certain: Test the waters!
You don’t have to dive into international dating head first. Yes, the top level platinum and VIP plans the agencies offer have a lot of very useful services and extra options, but for less than $30.00, often considerably less, you can test a site and see if you like it.
For instance, Anastasia, Amolatina, and Asian Beauties all offer introductory plans for $15.99. Other agencies have similar options and they are worth considering if you are hesitant to make the leap.
If you are pleased with the introductory plan you can always move up to the platinum or VIP program and get the extra options and services, but if you are unhappy you are only out the cost of a couple of six packs or maybe a steak dinner on the high end.
If You Are Unhappy, Complain!
Don’t be scared to complain. All of these agencies are very net savvy and they know that their clients also understand the internet, and the last thing that any of these agencies want is for an unhappy customer to be complaining in chat rooms and on message boards that they are scammers.
So, if you are unhappy, contact them and let them know. One big complaint is not receiving a reply from a woman to your email after several days and usually, if you contact the agency they will check it out.
Sometimes the super hot girl has moved or changed emails or been swept off her feet by a used car salesman from Omaha. In those cases, usually, the agency will refund your credit and let you contact someone else.
If a girl is trying to scam you the agency will almost always refund your credit and usually, they will agree to refund your payment if it is really a clear cut scam attempt.
The good agencies are working hard to overcome the negative image from some of the scams that took place in the 1990s, so they are usually willing to address anyone with a reasonable complaint.
However, remember, the agency cannot promise that there is even one woman on their site who will fall madly in love with you, so try to think clearly about the difference between poor service, scams, and simply being unlucky in love. There is a difference.
I can’t promise that you will find the love of your life on an international marriage site, but I do believe that most men can meet someone right for them if they really try.